Get you mad
Yo.. yo! (* Eminem hachs up spit *)
Mic check.. (My dick!)
Testing.. one, two (* Eminem hach-spits on mic *)
Ffff-f*ck.. (My d*ck!) My nuts..
My attitude is worse than NWA's was
I'll battle you over stupid shit and diss people
Who ain't have shit to do with it, like Cool J does (My tattoo!)
You see me standin outside of your buildin; screamin
Puffy is good, (HEY!) but Slim Shady is for the children! (WAIT!)
I look at my life in a new light - f*ck it
Give me two mics; I write songs for me - f*ck what you like
You're probably hear me rap half-hearted; cause I don't like rap anyway
I'm just tryin to get my porno career started
Every place and event.. Been There, Done That
Sh*t, Dre stuck me in a suitcase when he went
Come on, let's go!
Want a deal? Study these 5 chapters
Lesson One: Throw demos as hard as you can at signed rappers
Lesson Two: Face em and diss em (whattup dog?)
Don't give em a demo; kidnap em (I want you to come with me)
And make em come to your basement and listen
(you're gonna fuckin check this out)
Lesson Three: Get a job at a label; switch demos with Canibus
And put yours on the owner's table (here listen!)
Lesson Four: 'Know you heard this before'
Hey let me get your number; I'll call you tomorrow, for sure!
Don't act like a fan - you wanna get signed?
Get the whitest A&R you can find
Pull him aside and rap as wack as you can
Lesson Five: Get a hook-up at Jive
Dress up like I.C.P. and have them come see you perform live
And that's the key, but when you see me on the street; I ain't
Givin you shit bitch - don't even bother askin me (get away from me)
Toilet water splashes me right in the a*s when I'm spittin
Cause I'm always shittin when I'm rappin like Master P (UNNNGGGGH!)
Got a blowjob from Paula Jones, and stuffed it so far in her mouth
My balls broke both of her collarbones (OWW!)
Told Mya this shit was all about me-ah (It's all about me..)
Gave Alyssa Milano syphillis, mono and gonorrhea (You're a dick!)
And all three of my main girls said SEE-YA
Cause Brandy and Monica walked in and caught me fuckin Aaliyah
(What? Oh my God!) I splish splash while I'm takin a bath
Grab a handful of pills, break em in half, take em and laugh
White trash -- f*ckin your wife in the a*s (Oh! Ooh Shady! Oooh!)
While you're out siphoning gas for your lawnmower to cut the grass
So if I hurt your self-esteem
And you get dissed too bad [Yo why you diss me?]
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad
And when I rap about a buncha sh*t you wished you had [A big dick!]
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad
I can't listen to that song, that shit's too sad!
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad
He'll never make it, his wrist is slit too bad! [Nurse! Nurse!]
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad
What a wonderful day; I should go outside and play
Ain't no need to sit inside the house and hibernate
Hi Renee! (Oh hi!) I was just about to toss a live grenade
In your driveway (WHAT?) and drive away
Are you afraid of a blade made of a razor with AIDS
Blood drippin from it, rippin your stomach like a paper mache
You talk a lotta shit, but you was never ill though
I'm sick enough to beat you to death with a feather pillow
Tipped over some cows, just for a joke and a laugh (MOOOOO!)
Jumped up, choked a giraffe, snapped his neck and broke it in half
Wagin wars, went on stage and sprayed Cage with Agent Orange
And wiped my as* with his page in Source (Here!)
The demon is here, steamin this year
I rip [*Mystikal's*] voicebox out, scream in his ear
It's not a gimmick b*tch, it's an image I live it
