Dr. West (Skit)
[Dr. West]
"Morning, Marshall."
[Eminem]
"Morning, doc."
[Dr. West]
"So we're discharging you today, how are you feeling?"
[Eminem]
"Ah, anxious."
[Dr. West]
"Anxiety?"
[Eminem]
"Well, anxious to get home, anxious to get back into the world. Nervous."
[Dr. West]
"Nervous? C'mon, Marshall, you're a big boy now
You're sounding like a bit of a baby, you can do this
You found a sponsor yet?"
[Eminem]
"Um, not yet. But I mean, when I get back..."
[Dr. West]
"Well, if you find one, you find one. If you don't, you don't."
[Eminem]
"Well, yeah, I mean I gotta start going to meetings first and...
Wait, what?"
[Dr. West]
"Well, I mean you don't absolutely have to go to meetings
I mean it's not like... a requirement
If they fit into your schedule, I know you're a busy person."
[Eminem]
"Well, yeah, but I thought sobriety was the most important thing?"
[Dr. West]
"So what else are you thinking?"
[Eminem]
"Um, well, I know I gotta start practicing the steps, and
I mean, learn 'em, and start being able to apply 'em."
[Dr. West]
"The steps?"
[Eminem]
"Yeah, the steps."
[Dr. West]
"There's a lot of them, aren't there?"
[Eminem]
"Well, twelve, but–"
[Dr. West]
"Christ, I don't even know them all."
[Eminem]
"Really?"
[Dr. West]
"Anything else?"
[Eminem]
"Um, well, I mean the only other question I have is, like
What do I do if I find myself in a situation where
Maybe somebody is drinking around me or something like that
And I get tempted to—"
[Dr. West]
"Take a drink."
[Eminem]
"What?"
[Dr. West]
"Take a drink, and y'know, take the edge off."
[Eminem]
"Take the edge off? Man, if I have a drink I already know what that's gonna lead me to."
[Dr. West]
"What, you mean these?" *shakes pills*
[Eminem]
"No, what the fuck?!"
[Dr. West/Slim Shady]
"Marshall, what's the matter, darling? Having some doubts, are we? Marshall, you can't leave me, you'll never leave me, Marshall
We'll always be together, Marshall. Marshall? Marshall!!
[Eminem]
"Oh no, no, no! Come on, man!
Oh, fuck you, man!
No, no, no, NO!"
*Alarm beeps*
"Oh, shit!"
